I’m not entirely sure I want to blog, a word I’m using as a verb rather than a noun at the moment, and it’s mostly because I’m feeling content and happy and no particular pressure or impetus to reach beyond my immediate surroundings and speak. Except… except that there is something that needs said, and this is likely the best platform to say it from, which leaves me in a bit of a quandary.
And then, when I think about saying those things, I remember all the other things I haven’t said, and I feel like I must say those things first. So, this isn’t a rant about not blogging enough, nor is it a promise to blog more. I may blog exactly twice in the next month, including this current post. But the next post is important. This post just needs to be written so I can get it out of the way.
April and I spent half of June in the UK and Ireland, which was pretty fantastic. I shared about it a bit via Google+, so if you wanted to hear about our vacation but didn’t, you ought to consider following me there. Similarly, pictures were taken and shared, but only on G+ (and then I posted direct links to them to my Facebook Friends). For whatever reason, I no longer feel like sharing my pictures and intimate memories and moments with the whole world wide web.
Yesterday, I found myself wanting to go back. That is significant because I kind of hate travel and I definitely love being at home with the office door closed and the whole wide world shut away from me while I play a game or read and drink coffee (or a mixed drink with a faint hint of coffee floating therein). I already want to get away.
I cannot get away, and there is work to be done, both for the university that gives me a ludicrous amount of money to do a thing I enjoy, and for the church that needs some renovations, and for the Church that needs some renovations. For those missing the distinction, “church” with a lower-case C is just our local gig, but “Church” with an upper-case C means the entire group of God’s people, Christians, the Kingdom, and the holy universal Church. And in Springfield, there’s some stuff going down I need to write about.
But first I need to talk about vacation. And losing my Kindle, which I did in London. Thankfully, I was able to sell my iPhone on eBay just before we left, so I used that money to buy a new Kindle Paperwhite (and a Powerbag because it was on sale on Amazon! and a guy on G+ pointed it out to me because he remembered me sharing that I wanted one, which is pretty awesome). Also, winning a contest from Adobe in which I filled out a survey and they gave me a home theater system. I’m still trying to sell that system so I can in turn buy a new TV and replace my ~168 pound, 10-year-old monstrosity. Also, finishing the Wheel of Time series and reading several other good books.
Northern Ireland was beautiful. I loved getting out on the coast and hiking and seeing the outdoorsy sights. Which is interesting, because I’ve come to hate outdoorsy stuff here. The only main difference I can identify is that the weather sucks here. It was ~60 degrees F there, with super-low humidity, and I just loved it. I was so happy. Maybe April and I need to move north.
I’ve been toying with the idea of doing some sort of podcast. There are sermons I’d like to preach that I don’t think would fly well at our church. Maybe they take more theology, or they’re super controversial, or I’m just afraid. I’ve thought about recording those and putting them online. I’ve thought about going back and doing more book reviews. I’ve thought that, while I like the idea of having done these things, I know from past experience that I don’t actually enjoy doing them. I’d rather be reading and living inside my head.
But maybe they need done. I’m pretty good at doing stuff that needs done, I just don’t have a strong extrinsic or intrinsic motivator in these cases.
I’ve come far enough to know that I need to write at least one more blog post, though.
I’m becoming more comfortable with my introvertedness. I’ve decided that extrovert and introvert are useless titles and concepts when it comes to understanding someone else, but that they can help us understand ourselves if for no other reason than that they give us permission to feel normal. I’m not a freak, deviant, abnormal, nerd for living a life of ideas and not wanting to have a huge circle of friends. I want to have a few deep relationships. I’m an introvert, and that’s OK. But I’ve been weighing some things more consciously than I used to, trying to decide whether certain events are worth attending–will they lead to the sort of relationships I am seeking? Will they result in deeper connections? If not–if they are shallow, fleeting things, ships-passing-each-other-in-the-night sort of parties, then I’d rather avoid them. I used to not question, and I’d just go to the events. I would sometimes feel guilty for not going. Now I question, and I no longer feel guilty. I feel strong, and happy, and I appreciate the friends I have even more because I recognize their value. They are more valuable to me than those shallow relationships. I can identify them now in a way I couldn’t before.
This Sunday I am preaching the gospel. I want people to hear about the God I know, the one I’m familiar with. I think that God maybe looks a bit different to me than he does to some other people. Maybe not–it’s hard to tell when I’m so often living inside my own head. But I look forward to sharing, and I’m specifically going to focus on the parables of Jesus.
Did you know that parables are widely considered horrible teaching tools? They totally are because listeners can come up with a myriad of interpretations for them. If you want to teach a specific lesson, why would you use a tool that results in numerous conclusions?
Did you know that whenever Jesus was asked what a parable meant, he told people? Sometimes he told them without them even asking. Jesus knew what he meant, and the Holy Spirit can help us get there too.
That’s not really what my sermon is about, but I still think it’s cool.
Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality did not give me nightmares last week, but I thought it would. That book (it is fan-fiction set in an alternate universe where Harry was raised by loving, educated parents and he’s a genius) gets wicked dark in the most recent chapters. It was rough.
There are some tax law things going on in Missouri that have me worried, and I’m curious to see if the governor’s veto holds. I should probably write a post about that… we’ll see though. If the Republican Party is able to get their tax changes through in the next couple of years that they want, April and I might have to think harder about leaving the state. That’s how much they concern me.
My next blog post will be about the activist group Christians Uniting for Political Action and the city of Springfield considering making sexual orientation a protected class in regards to workplace discrimination. Expect that soon… I just had to get the above out of the way first.